- Be sure to give constructive and irrelevant criticism while comparing your relative, who knows how to “draw”.
- Always measure success in terms of sales, because that’s what matters, right? And no one creates art for art’s sake!
- Inquire about the price of a particular piece or a commission, then make a substantially lower offer to purchase or start a bidding war like akin to swap meets and flea markets. After all, You are doing them a favor by making a purchase.
- Make the Artist acutely aware of said favor being bestowed.
- Refer back to aforementioned relative and how he or she could do it cheaper, free, and/or better.
- Let the artist know that the work is not especially creative, and how so and so or you could do it better, IF you really wanted to.
- Stand there gawking in awkward silence (Artists love that).
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Disclaimer: This article is purely satirical in case that was not blatantly obviously, in which case I missed the mark!