hearing ms. badu drawl “…better go back the way you came/…if you stay/be prepared to have your whole shyt rearranged/its gon be some slow singing and flower bringing/…if you fall in love with me…”* brings a smile to my lips ever since i discovered the truth of her words. what a tragedy it can be sometimes to be that sistah that’s on some other ish and not quite making sense to the masses and often misunderstood and battered but not broken in an effort to be her authentic self, and simply wanting the same from the brotha that would like to occupy her space and share some time.
what do you do when being with you is like taking the “red pill”? when you are constantly evolving, constantly growing, and what maybe known as true can sometimes change daily on this journey to realization and actualization. what can she say when it can’t be explained with words or at least not any that comprise the english language as currently spoken unless we meet trekking through the woods, creating a path instead of following one.
sometimes the perceived expectation is too much weight to carry and brothas buckle and retreat to their comfort zones, and suddenly she’s a whore, a bitch, too independent, a ball buster, lesbian, dyke, freak and cursed to forever be alone “cuz don’t no man want to hear that new age hippie shit, you ain’t no erykah badu”. funny thing is she’s not trying to be anyone but SHE, whoever she may be. open to and expecting change, cuz after all that’s the name of the game when it comes to evolution. open to love, in a universal that’s-all-that-exists-kinda sense.
though it hurts sometimes, She would do it all again. no regrets on having the veil removed to reveal the unfathomable truth. testify to the sublime and ever changing times. she makes love in her mind, and attempts to see light and GOD in each person she meets. wanting to share the wonders eye see, but brothas don’t see HER. only what they’d like, wish, or hope her to be. some even attempt to save, tame, dismantle, and shame. through all SHE says “thanks”, because a purpose lies in each interaction, a lesson, an opportunity for growth and evolution, and more times than not a revolution of self.
knowing that SHE can’t love them whole, they have to love from some other space, some other place. no matter how much she may want to reflect the beauty and love beneath the surface of their exterior. wanting that love returned with the same passion and free fall, to touch the depth of the soul and grow together and love in the moment for as long as it lasts…
*Lyrics from ~Erykah Badu, Fall In ♥ (Your Funeral)