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4-letter word

love. i was in love once many moons ago, and for the life of him, he could not understand why or how i came to love the way i do. i would like to say did, as if it can be cured, because i’m definitely a hopeless romantic and believer in love. despite his protestations i insisted that i loved him in spite of his flaw and loved his weaknesses with the same passion and excitement as i did his strengths and eccentricities. his confusion and wonderment of my love continued; which planted a seed in my mind.

the seed blossomed into an epiphany: if he was so enamored, bewildered, and just plan stumped at my love; he was incapable of returning that love. which translated into the blatant disrespect and lack of sensitivity that crept into the relationship and the selfishness that pervaded it. please don’t feel bad for me, because i learned that choosing to love is a risk, and that heart ache and sometimes heart break are all part of the package. love heals me and renews my spirit, regardless of the love or love loss; which in itself is a fallacy. you never lose love. love is you. so unless you lose yourself, love remains.

i’ve gained throughout the years the courage to continue to love in spite and despite the entanglements and snares of love. moments of love, as well as moments in love or was it lust (that is another post for a later date) has given rise to some beautiful, comical, steamy, and most certainly unforgettable moments. i am well on my way to being that sassy shocking grandmother recounting her youth as a pyt who learned along the way that love is the journey, not the destination.

no matter how love is experienced, it is all love at day’s end. i love love. being love. being in love. being loved. in my fuchsia colored view, love is a gift worth giving without expecting a thing in return. love is free to give to whomever whenever wherever. the words tattooed on my arm “love free” go with me everyday to serve not only as a reminder, but as an inspiration to continue to be love, regardless of outcome. after all we all came from love and will return to love.


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